I get these intense moments where I feel like I’m about to lose control… My blood starts to boil, begging to be released from the skin that binds it. My mind races, causing thoughts and images of rage and hatred to pour in. My body twists and contorts into awkward, painful shapes - as if thoughts themselves are coiling around my body, causing it to crumple. The images take over my persona. My grin stretches from ear to ear as the vivid, violent pictures of my bloodied self stretch before my mind’s eye. I try to fight the overwhelming urges but to no avail… You want this. I hear. Don’t fight it.